


80/20

by Ermerness



Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Arriving early, Established Relationship, First Time Topping, M/M, Top Callum, bottom Ben
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-16
Updated: 2019-09-16
Packaged: 2020-10-20 00:08:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20666066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ermerness/pseuds/Ermerness
Summary: Callum gets up the courage to try topping for the first time but it doesn't go perfectly.





	80/20

Callum doesn't know how to bring it up. He wants to, he really does, but he doesn't know what the proper way is to go about it. Does he just bring anal sex up randomly in conversation? Does he ask in the middle of sex? He has no idea but he knows Ben must have done it before and he wants to ask questions like – how often has he done it? Does it hurt? Does he like giving or receiving? Does he want Callum to be on the receiving end?

During the sex they've been having at no point has Ben made any move or comment about wanting it either way. It's not like when they're in bed Ben rolls over and begs Callum to fuck him. The closest they've got is Ben sticking a finger in his arse during a blowjob a couple of times which normally causes Callum to come almost immediately when his prostate is rubbed. 

One evening, when he's alone as Ben has plans with his mum, he'd gone onto pornhub and typed in 'anal sex'. Just the pictures alone for the videos scared him enough that he'd slammed his phone face down on the table, his face beet red. 

He'd got a bit more courage a few days later when he was waiting for Ben to come over. He'd actually clicked into a video and pressed play. He watched as the two men on screen got straight to it – one of them on their hands and knees and the other behind. Callum shoved down his zipper and gave himself a firm squeeze as he felt his balls tighten. His eyes shut and he immediately thought about what it'd be like if Ben was there, on his hands and knees, arse in the air begging for it. He was able to come and clean up before Ben walked in with their dinner, none the wiser. 

He really wants to ask. He also wants to know why Ben hasn't brought it up. Does he not want that from Callum? Does he think Callum's too vanilla? 

He finally gets the courage two weeks later. They're on the couch in Callum's place, sitting pressed up against each other and Ben's hand is resting on his thigh. The movie they're watching is a comedy and every now and again Ben will let out a loud laugh that startles Callum out of his thoughts. 

“Ben,” Callum starts, unsure of himself. 

“Yeah?” Ben says distractedly, eyes still on the TV and his other hand shoving a bit of popcorn in his mouth. 

“Err, umm, can I ask you something?” Callum stutters, shifting nervously, his hands getting clammy. 

“Course,” Ben replies, still staring at the TV. 

“I was, err, I was sort of wondering.... Well, you know how we have sex but not all of the types of sex, or something, I err, don't know how to put it but we do a lot of stuff and I didn't know if you wanted more... stuff,” Callum forces out, knowing he sounds like a moron and he feels his face go red. 

Ben slowly turns his head to stare at him, looking confused. “I don't think I got any of that.”

Callum sighs in frustration at his inability to articulate properly. “I'm talking about... stuff we don't do.”

Ben cocks his head and reaches for the remote, pressing pause on the film. “Callum, if you're asking for something kinky then I am 110% on board you know that.” Ben's eyes light up with mischief and he gives Callum's thigh a squeeze. 

“No, it's err, standard I think for some gay couples, not that I know any or anything but I know it's considered fairly normal ya know.”

Ben looks completely baffled while Callum is talking but suddenly his eyes light up and a grin spills across his face. 

“Oh my god, all this blabbering cos ya wanna talk about anal sex with me?” 

Callum feels his face get even hotter and he's surprised that's even possible. “Yeah,” he mumbles. 

Ben gets that soft, fond look on his face like Callum is the most adorable thing he's ever seen. “Ask away.”

Callum fidgets slightly, thinking through the questions rolling through his head. “Have you done it like... a lot?”

Ben shrugs. “Depends how you define a lot. Most hookups I only did hand and mouth stuff but I've done it a fair bit.”

“Did ya, err, did you... like it?” Callum looks at his hands, feeling embarrassed. 

“Callum, it's fine to talk about this stuff. And yeah I like it. Now, your next question will be about whether I pitch or catch yeah?” Ben looks to Callum and Callum nods once, still looking away. “Both but I'm an 80/20 kinda guy.”

“80/20?” Callum asks, brow furrowed as his eyes finally meet Ben's. 

“80% bottom, 20% top. Most of the time I like to be on the receiving end of things shall we say.”

“Did you want me to... do that for you? Be on the bottom?” Callum asks, his voice rocky and nervous. 

“Only if you wanted to.”

Callum reaches a hand up to rub at the back of his neck anxiously. “How come you haven't wanted to do any of that with me?”

Ben smirks. “Oh I have. Every night we're in bed I wish you'd bend me over and fuck me hard but you're new to all this so I knew I had to wait until this conversation happened.”

“I want to, I just, didn't know how to discuss it. How do you know what... role you wanna take?” Callum asks, his hands waving wildly in front of him. 

“You just know sometimes. And if you don't, you try both ways and see if you have a preference. Some guys don't and will switch it up.” Ben turns his body to face him. “If ya shut ya eyes and let your mind go somewhere dark and dirty, am I taking it from ya or are you taking it from me?”

Callum shuts his eyes but he doesn't need to. He's been thinking about it ever since he started letting himself consider the idea of anal sex. 

He's only in a pair of grey jogger bottoms and he feels his cock grow hard as images fill his head of Ben laid out in front of him, knees up at his chest, mouth open in ecstasy as Callum rocks into him. 

“You're taking,” Callum states before stuttering out, “not that I wouldn't wanna try, one day, the other way round.”

Ben nods like they've just agreed to go shopping the next day. “Great,” Ben says, turning back to face the TV and picking up the remote to turn the film back on. 

“That it?” Callum asks, feeling somewhat disappointed as Ben settles back down next to him, eyes on the TV. Ben gives him a glance. 

“What? Ya wanna screw me right now?” Ben asks, eyes soft and teasing, his eyes flicking briefly to the bulge in Callum's grey jogger bottoms. 

“Nah, it's fine,” Callum says bitterly, sitting back into the couch and trying to do everything to calm himself down. Now it's out there, the thought of what Ben will feel like under him or when he's inside of him fills his head and he can barely stop himself getting harder. He shifts a few times, trying to refocus on the movie but it's no good as he looks across the room at the table and wonders if Ben would let Callum bend him over it. 

He shifts again and Ben lets out an exaggerated sigh as he leans forward and picks up the remote, pausing the film. “You want it now, don't ya?”

Callum nods dumbly as his hand clenches against his own thigh, holding back the urge to give himself a brief stroke. He then takes in Ben's smirk and realises he's being wound up. “You dick – you want it just as bad as I do.”

Ben smiles and jumps to his feet. “Of course I fucking do. I'll be back in 10.”

“What?” Callum barks out, standing as well, feeling his face heat that his hard dick is jutting outward under his bottoms. 

“Lube, Callum. Haven't got any here and didn't realise tonight would be the night so give me 10 minutes to grab some. Go get naked in bed or load the dishwasher or something whilst I'm gone.” Ben gives him a wink and leaves, door shutting softly behind him. Callum stands in the middle of the room, looking around desperately for something to distract him from the endless chain of thoughts going around his head. Would he be good at it? What if he's bad or comes too early or can't get it in? Ben always makes him feel comfortable and confident in the bedroom and he knows this will be no different but he still feels the anxiety rise in his chest anyway. 

Ben returns a bit later to find Callum sitting on the sofa, one hand in his bottoms as he gives himself a very light stroke. 

“That's hot,” Ben comments, shrugging off his jacket as his eyes take in Callum hungrily, his tongue peeking out to lick his lips. “I could just stand here and watch ya touch yaself.”

Callum pulls his hand out and stands abruptly. “Bedroom. Now.”

Ben's eyes go dark. “God I love it when you order me around.” 

Callum gets his clothes off quickly before sitting back onto the bed and watching as Ben undresses in front of him. He briefly notices Ben placing a small plastic bottle and condom on the bedside table before he climbs on top of Callum, fitting their mouths together in a deep, frenzied kiss that makes Callum's toes curls. He always love this, the feeling of Ben's whole body lying against his, how masculine he smells and the feel of his boyfriend's cock growing hard against his thigh. He lets his hands roam Ben's body, grabbing at his thighs and arse greedily as Ben gives a brief rock against him. 

“What do I... err do?” Callum asks against Ben's lips, feeling entirely out of his depth. 

“Lie there, baby, and look pretty,” Ben says with a quick kiss to Callum's nose as he climbs off and grabs the lube, pouring a small amount on one of his fingers. Callum watches intently as Ben lies down next to him and pulls his knees up toward his chest. Ben's hand reaches down and Callum stares as Ben slips a single finger inside himself slowly, a frown of concentration on his face as he moves it slightly deeper and faster. Callum watches avidly, finding his hand straying to his own erection to touch himself lightly, eyes fixed on watching where Ben is fingering himself with two fingers now, slowly stretching himself out. He can hear his breathing become louder as his balls tighten briefly at the sight in front of him and he can't help but feel the intimacy of the situation. 

“Come here,” Ben says breathlessly as he pulls his fingers out and Callum is on top of him immediately, reconnecting their mouths in a messy, languid kiss. Callum sits back as his shaky fingers grab the condom wrapper and tears it open, fumbling with impatience and nerves and pure arousal as he rolls it on quickly and follows with a quick wipe of lube. Ben pulls his legs up and out and Callum repositions himself over Ben. 

“Go slow, yeah? It's been a while and you ain't exactly small,” Ben says softly, eyes dark and wanting. 

Callum nods, unable to speak as he reaches down to his hard cock, pushing himself gently against the tight ring of muscle. He lets out a shaky sigh as he pushes in slowly, his eyes rolling back and his stomach coiling as the pressure around his cock tightens. The sound of Ben letting out small huffs and grunts fills the air. He gets himself all the way in and finally opens his eyes to see Ben, whose head is thrown back, mouth open and eyes closed like he's in heaven. Callum glances down and feels a moment of surrealism that he's inside Ben. 

“OK?” Callum says shakily, his arms trembling. 

“More than OK, there's a lot of ya,” Ben replies with a smile, eyes looking up at Callum with adoration. 

Callum pulls out before giving a too fast shove back inside and Ben grimaces in discomfort, his hand going to Callum's bicep and tightening. 

“Sorry,” Callum apologises softly, trying to use every last tiny bit of willpower he has to not fuck into Ben like a mad man. 

“Nah it's fine,” Ben says, reaching a hand up to cup Callum's face. “This is perfect.”

Callum smiles before pulling out ever so slightly and rocking back in, his eyes shutting in bliss at the tight grip of heat surrounding his cock. It's better than anything he could ever imagine and he realises how badly he wanted this intimacy with Ben. He thrusts slowly in and out, trying not to go too fast for his own sake as well as Ben's. He shifts Ben up a little so his back curves more and pushes in harder, the angle clearly better when Ben's hand grabs his arm as his throws his head back and lets out a loud groan. 

Callum's eyes fix on Ben and his gorgeous body and the way he's lying there open and vulnerable and letting Callum move inside him. It's an intoxicating sight and feeling and he feels his restraint dissolving. 

He lets out a few grunts of effort as he starts fucking into Ben slightly faster. All of a sudden the last traces of his control disappear and he gives five fast, impatient thrusts, shoving himself in deep and hard. His eyes widen when he feels his balls tighten and he opens his mouth to apologise or warn Ben or something but nothing comes out as he comes hard, his body shaking through it as he unloads into Ben's tight, clenching body. 

Callum collapses on top of Ben, pulling out in the process and sprawling on top of him. He feels his face go bright red with embarrassment. He's never been so grateful for the position they're in as he can bury his hot, red face in Ben's neck.

“S-sorry,” Callum says against Ben's soft skin, kissing it gently. “So sorry. I'll last longer next time, it was just overwhelming.”

Ben shushes him and rubs a reassuring hand up and down Callum's back. “That was amazing.”

Callum shakes his head, still not pulling back to look at Ben. “I'm so sorry.”

Ben turns his face so his cheek is against Callum's hair. “It was your first time, Callum. I'm flattered my arse is that good.” Callum can hear the reassurance in Ben's voice and how casual he is about the fact his boyfriend lasted under 5 minutes. Callum slowly pulls back and rolls off Ben, grimacing as he reaches down to pull off the filled condom. 

“Sorry,” Callum says again as he ties off the condom and puts it in the bin by their bed. 

“You say that one more time and I'm not ever letting you fuck me again,” Ben says and Callum finally lets his eyes reach Ben's. He's expecting some teasing or taunting or even a joke at his expense at how fast he came but instead all he sees is Ben looking at him like he hung the stars. It fills Callum with an unbelievable level of love for his gorgeous boyfriend and how patient he's been with Callum. 

“I'll get better,” Callum promises. Ben nods in understanding and reaches for him, pulling him into a hug. After allowing himself a brief, treasured moment of being wrapped in Ben's arms he pulls away and slowly makes his way down Ben's body, fitting his mouth over the tip of Ben's erection. Ben lets out a brief yell as his hand goes and curls tightly into Callum's hair, gripping his head and dictating the movement as he fucks up into Callum's mouth. It doesn't take long for Ben to climax down Callum's throat and he lets out a sated sigh as they both lie back on the bed, both staring at the ceiling, their bodies lying pressed together. 

“Thank you for tonight and letting me... ya know,” Callum says earnestly, turning his face to the side and smiling at Ben, eyes filled with love. 

“You're welcome to my arse anytime,” Ben replies sleepily, curling into Callum's body, throwing a leg and arm over him. Callum gratefully cuddles into him, finding the warmth of his boyfriend's body pressed against his own reassuring and wonderful. He decides to delay having a freak out about bottoming another day because right now he's got all he needs.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not great at smut but thought I'd post it anyway instead of leaving it on my hard drive. This fandom needs lots of fic. Thanks so much for all your kudos/comments on my other fics!


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